welcome home (sanitarium)

last post was when i was in hospital with nothing to do. beautiful song tho. was discharged 3 days later. had interview at MOE the following day. spent 2 weeks preparing for PE physical proficiency test which was held yesterday in the blistering heat. i think i did ok for the ppt. i really hope i pass and get accepted into NIE. although i have a gut feeling i may not be accepted cos i'm still technically a student at NUS. if only they allow me to quit NUS after being accepted into NIE. everything would fall into place very nicely. i'll have something to live for once again. a brighter future. one i'm more willing to work hard and be more determined to fulfill. tho the whole thing will last EiGHT years including bond. that's a freaking long time la. but if i do get in then i'm gonna make sure history doesn't repeat itself. for one, i'll be doing something i have passion for instead of something i seemed to be good at. for two, i'll be paid and school fees sponsored unless i fail and then have my contract terminated which then means i'll have to pay them back everything which would be a lot of money. i really want a new start.

floorball league has started. 4 games played, 1 win and 3 defeats. opening day loss to moosemen 1-5 followed by midweek defeat to nemesis 1-2 which we could have and probably should have gotten a result then a victory against victoria school 6-3 which i scored my first ever div 1 goal after capt renji relayed a pass to me from a free hit and ended the game with a clean sheet with my defensive partner. then another midweek match against merahans ended in a dissappointing 0-13 thrashing. our worst performance to date. everybody seemed to be one step slower than the opponents. me n my partner conceded the bulk of the goals i think. anyway my partner for this season is javier, a newbie who isn't really a noob. played floorball before nus if i remember correctly. so far we've had good understanding and communication except for the mauling. before the start of every match he'd say "protect me" and i'll laugh. i think he's capable of protecting himself and has put in quite reasonable performances so far. i'll continue to impart whatever knowledge and experience i have on him. i think he has potential. the highlight of saints 09 so far has been the transformation of khairul into a powerful attacking force. he's our top scorer right now having scored 3 goals in the 2 games he's played. if all goes according to plan, we could finish mid-table instead of battling to beat the drop on the final day of the season.

ok next match is not our fight. against zarf. later at 6. come down to support saints! we'll be trying very hard to work on our weaknesses (which i won't say here in case there are spies. haha) and we'll do our best to keep the score more respectable than merahans match.

oh on the finance side, i was contemplating buying fatpipe bow vs iphone. i went for the latter. since my stick has served me well. i'll buy the bow if and when my curve breaks. it's been getting some major slashes recently. heart painnnn....

nine inch nails - hurt

I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything

What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

I wear this crown of thorns
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time
The feelings disappear
You are someone else
I am still right here

What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way